This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
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