I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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