I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
