Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Randomize
