Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
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