The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
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