the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Randomize
