id be glad to
this just has baby written all over it
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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