Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
