I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
