bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
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