i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
