I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Randomize
