Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
