im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
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