I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
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