I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
