My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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