guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
