So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I can't turn off my feet"
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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