do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
