Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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