We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Randomize
