I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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