at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Randomize
