Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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