Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Randomize
