The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
