Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
