Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize