5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
