I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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