We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
