he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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