He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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