I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
