the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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