Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
