i permit you to call me
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
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