butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
