I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
