there was a trapeze. enough said
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize