I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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