did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize