im drinking this country out of the recession.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize
