I swear she didn't look like that last week.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
you never un-have a 4some
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
