ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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