i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
