also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Randomize
