? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
