The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
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