i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
false alarm, still single
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
