its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Randomize